They call me a Pharmacist

I was pondering over how I would say this. How I would start this entry and slowly make my way through my thoughts until I got my point across.
But you know what? I didn't find a better way than to just say it, so I will.

We, the pharmacists of this world, are the only ones capable of providing you all with medicine!! Literally!
You may trust your physician more than us, heck, your physician may mock us all the hell he wants, but at the end of the day he prescribes to you the medication that WE - graduates of schools of pharmacy - discovered, researched, developed, slaved over, clinically trialled, produced, quality controlled, and sold. And that's just a tiny part of it!! There is so much more that goes behind all this, that pharmacists do, but for some reason it's all conveniently forgotten. With all do respect to all the physicians, they wouldn't know the difference between Naphthenes and Naphthalene if their lives depended on it. And I'm not saying that they should!! They know much more in several other fields related to their work as physicians, and things that don't concern us as pharmacists. Not to mention that they work hand in hand with us in bringing about the introduction of a new drug as they are right there when the drug is still in clinical trials. (I'm diverting from the topic, let me get back to my point.)

My point is, when the pharmacist who is the one that creates all the medicine in this world, and the one who provided cures for so many diseases today, and the same one who God willingly may have the cure for late stage cancer one day, is degraded to become a human robot routinely working in a job where he is under appreciated, under paid, and under challenged, well .. doesn't that sort of KILL any creativity or any hope of creating anything that may be worth any use to this world?!
Again, with all do respect to all the pharmacists who work in pharmacies in Egypt -including myself- (and I say Egypt because in developed countries like the U.S and Germany, pharmacists have a real job which doesn't revolve around helping you choose a lip gloss that goes with the color of the nail polish you just chose. They have a real job that is critical and requires specific study and cannot be delegated to anyone else but a pharmacist. ), lets get real. You could be doing this job with 5% of what you studied in college. There are only basics that you need to know to work in a pharmacy, and the biggest proof of that is all the physicians, dentists, lawyers, etc who wear a lab coat and carry entire shifts alone in a pharmacy.

I know, if I don't like it I should just leave.
And you know what? I will!
But it saddens me greatly to see all this potential go to waste.
Hidden under piles and piles of frustration, dis-gratitude, and giving in to "the bitter reality".
A bitter reality that has made an entire society view us as salesmen, and make jokes about it on our expense.

And the saddest part is, I can't blame them. Because I've seen how all of them are true.

Here comes the bride, all dressed in .. a white labcoat.

You know what's adorable?
Mothers.

But, not all of them.

Not all mothers are adorable, no.
Some mothers are just annoying.

Like this one.

It's a regular day at the pharmacy. A lady walks in, asks for some medications, I give her what she asks for, and she leaves.

But wait.

She turns back around, and asks me for my name.
"You're cute doctor, what's your name?
Engi.
Are you engaged?
Umm, no.
In a relationship?
Err.. uh.. no?
hahaha, ok then. *wink* "

And she's gone.

Or is she?

7 minutes later, the phone in the pharmacy rings.
My boss picks up, someone is asking for me.
I pick up the phone and .. well, take a wild guess who is on the other line?

" Hey Dr. Engi, I'm the lady who was just speaking with you a few minutes ago.
Yes, hey. Can I help you?
Here, write my number down, and give me a missed call after work.
I'm sorry, what?
Well I don't want to chat and take you away from your work, wouldn't want you to get into any trouble.
*how thoughtful*
So when you're off work, just give me that missed and I will call you right back.
Is everything ok?
Oh yes yes, everything is great! Good news, good news."

Of course I never did call her back. And apparently I didn't need to, because the next day her son came to the pharmacy himself. But thank God it was my day off.
My boss is actually the one who told me. He said a young man came and asked about me (me whom he has never even seen!) and left his "credentials" and phone number. (wtf?!)

I felt like a TV set at that moment.
Bride window shopping.
I don't know about you, but I didn't find it flattering at all.
I found it insulting. Here I am slaving away,unappreciated, in this place, when some lady takes a look at me and thinks "well she looks like she's got nothing better to do. I'll have my little boy come and check her out himself. I wonder if she comes in lilac!! Oh how lovely!" -_-
But you know what? I'm pretty sure many pharmacies have participated in the marriage of plenty.
Come to think of it, I think that may actually be one of their greatest uses in Egypt.

Wow, this pharmacy business never fails to surprise me.
There is so much more to it than meets the eye.

And that freaks me out, sometimes.

Give me my medicine!!

As I mentioned before, in a perfect world, in a perfect pharmacy, everything your heart desires can be found in surplus amounts. Things you’ve heard about before, things you never knew existed, and things that never have.

There is no such thing as “we will have that next week” or “ the company has stopped producing that” or “are you sure that’s how its spelt?”

In a perfect world, whatever you want, you get.

Which brings me to my point.

There is a lot of medication in our world. When a new medication is produced, it's under a patency. A lot of medication is overpriced either because a lot of money was spent on research and development, clinical trials and finally producing it, or because pharmaceutical companies want to rip you off.  Whichever the reason, it makes it very hard to acquire certain medication, that’s why some nice people decided to recreate the same medicine – the brand drug -  using the same active ingredient, but give it a different name and sell it for a much lower price. But that can only happen after the patency expires.That, my friends, is called a generic drug, which is the alternative of the original brand.

For some reason, many people do not trust the generic drug. They only trust the medication their physician has prescribed them and scribbled down on a piece of paper (without giving a hoot if it still exists or not, that’s not his job. That’s a pharmacist’s job. What’s that? Are you wondering what all those medical reps are doing then? Oh I don’t know. I guess the doctor is too busy to pay attention to EVERYTHING they tell him. Come ooon, cut the guy some slack.) People like that are quite difficult, and very hard to please. No matter how hard you try to explain that the medicine on the prescription is not available on the market and that they may take another one with the exact same substituent in the exact same concentration and get better, they will not have it. Just hearing the word generic makes them freak out!! What generic!? Oh Dear God, why?! Why why why!! This can’t be happening to them! Oh no!! You give them THAT medication, right this minute! Make it appear out of thin air or have it fly in from the US!! For all they care, you can send for it from Mars, but they want that medication. Ironically, they can’t even read the prescription so you could have acted like the generic was the drug prescribed, but there you go again with all your Pharmacist morals. 

Well, aren’t you pathetic.

That's a P .. for Poy.

You know that joke that says "Be nice to pharmacists, we can kill you with one mistake?"
No?? hahaha, that's a shame.

Anyways.
In case you haven't noticed, medicine has funny names.
Pharmaceutical companies just can't give medication a normal name. It has to sound like some sort of a skin infection, like weird Latin taxonomy. But even simple names that have grown on all of us like Abimol and Flagyl still pose a difficulty in pronunciation for many people.
Imagine the daily dilemma that faces pharmacists in trying to differentiate between a P and a B, especially over the phone!!

Forget the P and the B.

Just trying to get someone to pronounce the name of a medicine - P and B less - correctly is almost a miracle. It's like " Hey! Aren't you the pharmacist? You figure it out!" .. which is sort of the same approach all those snobby doctors use when writing prescriptions. They find it amusing to have us suffer as we squint and glare and hyperventilate trying to figure out what in the world is written.
Like we don't suffer enough.

The most fascinating part about all this, is how the patients try to convince us - no matter how many graves we swear on - that the medicine they just asked for, with that specific pronunciation, exists! If you don't know it, then it's you - the pharmacist's - fault. Yes. Uhuh. Yep. Without a shadow of a doubt. It is your fault and you are the one mistaken.

Aren't you always wrong?

God.
This profession is never paying off.

Chill, I'm a doctor.

It's safe to say that when it comes to your physician, there is no room for you to be embarrassed about anything. That should apply to your pharmacist as well, since they are the one who provide you with the medication your physician has subscribed.
But, from what I've seen, that's not the case.

For some reason people find the silliest things to be embarrassed about.
They walk into the pharmacy acting like they just stole something, like they don't want anyone to know they've been here.
For starters, anything that is to be used by a lady must be placed in a black bag. It's ridiculous.
It's so ridiculous, that it's gotten to the point that even hair dye embarrasses some people!
And don't get me started with the blue pill *rolls eyes*.

I think it's because at some point along the way people have completely forgotten the fact that we are pharmacists, and hence associated with the whole health care system thingamabob.
They address us by "doctor" but it just slips their mind what that really means.

I guess that happens when you sell too much conditioner and toothpaste.
Can't really blame them.
I sort of forget too, sometimes!

Would you like a band-aid with that?

One of the greatest advantages of working in a pharmacy, is the excitement you get out of bargaining.

"That's 74 LE, Sir.
How about 70 LE?
No, Sir. 74 LE. We don't do discounts.
Thing is, I don't like change. Why don't you just make it 70?
74 LE. "

"So, how much of a discount are you gonna make for me doctor? 
We don't give discounts.
Oh come on! I just paid 240 LE. Help me out over here.
I'm sorry, pharmacy policy. Matter of fact, The Syndicate of Pharmacists mandates us to never make discounts.
But everyone else gives discounts.
Well, they're not supposed to."

"Hey, I'd like the diet sugar for 4.60 LE but can I have it for 4.50 LE ? And I'll trade you one of those band-aids you give for .10 change.
*silence*
Hello?"

I really don't get it. Pharmacies aren't supposed to give discounts, but some pharmacies give up part of their own profit just for the sake of getting more customers. It's ridiculous. It's not like we need more reasons for a lower salary. Isn't it enough that we sell medicine by the "strip" and sometimes by the "tablet"?!

Besides, why does everyone expect to get a discount at a pharmacy? In which part of the world is that a regular procedure?
When you walk into a McDonald's, do you ask for a discount?
Why do you expect to get one at a pharmacy?
Why won't you respect the fact that medicine is priced by the Ministry of Health and just save yourself and the pharmacist the time, energy, and embarrassment of bargaining?

Think of that the next time you beg the pharmacist to give you a discount for being "such a loyal client".
You don't buy one and get one free in here, this isn't Pizza Hut!

Seriously, though.

I often wonder how people imagine the inside of a pharmacy to be like.
The people who have probably never stepped foot inside of one before.
You know, all those people who call us everyday to ask for silly things or even important medicine.
The people who get so upset if you keep them on hold as you answer the waiting.

I think, in their minds, the pharmacy is a magical world where hundreds of little people (emphasis on hundreds) dressed in white lab coats scurry around taking phone calls, preparing orders, checking prices, medicine availabilities, and giving shots. Where we - the pharmacists - hurry about measuring blood pressure and blood glucose, choosing the perfect shade of lipstick for people, and sell single diapers.

A world where orders reach you the moment you put down your phone, and anything you order is always in stock and expires in 2056.

Seriously though, I really doubt anybody understands how annoying it is to work in a pharmacy. How annoying it is to deal with people who are unrealistic, over demanding, and ungrateful. I'm not referring to every one of course. I'm referring to the man who calls and asks for 4 boxes of Zolam. I'm referring to the woman who wants me to send her a nail polish that is neither too pink nor too white.

These people need to step foot inside a real pharmacy, not the one in their head.
They need to put on a white lab coat, in a stuffy pharmacy, on a 40 degree day, and stay 8 hours long answering phone calls.
Not to punish them, nor poke fun at how they will deal with it, but simply to have them appreciate us and what we do more. To have them understand what it takes to balance all the phone calls and all the orders and all the requests without having it all explode in your face.
Just a little bit of gratitude. A little bit of appreciation. A little bit of understanding.
Is that too much to ask for?

Seriously, though.
I doubt it would make a difference!